Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
“When we think that our prayers have not been answered we should not become depressed over it. I am certain that God is telling us that we must wait for a better time, more grace, or that a better gift will be given us.
God is being and wants us to sit, dwell and ground ourself in this knowledge while at the same time realizing that we are noble, excellent, assessed as precious and valuable and have been given creation for our enjoyment.”
Julian of Norwich (1342-1416) in Meditations with Julian of Norwich, Meditation 27, introduction and versions by Brendan Doyle (Santa Fe: Bear & Company, 1983).
My back pain persists for a second week. Since it has been an up and down problem for seven years, countless times I have prayed for relief. Perhaps you too wrestle with a long-time challenge in your life for which you have repeatedly prayed for help from God? If so, then you too know what it is like to be tempted to feel depressed over it.
Julian of Norwich would say not to focus on the pain but focus on the grace that you need, that everyone needs, to make it through life and trust that a better gift at a better time will come because God is a generous God and can be trusted.
Julian was an anchoress. She lived in the small room attached to the church in Norwich, England. People would visit her and be blessed by the interaction. She wrote the book Showings or Revelations of Divine Love, the first book written by a woman in the English language (1395).
The anchoress role fit Julian perfectly because her perspective then was and now remains solid as a rock. The answer in the midst of our pain is to wait for more grace and a better gift at a better time. This is the posture of the soul that trusts in the divine love of God.
My wife, Jenni, is somewhat of a present day anchoress. She’s a spiritual director who has made our home a sanctuary and who meets with women at coffee shops or on trails to walk in God’s creation. She excels at sitting and dwelling with the Lord and encouraging others to hear His voice.
Why mention her? This weekend in reflecting on my pain, she (like Julian) asked: “What do you think the Lord is trying to tell you?” Her question was lifting my gaze upward from my pain to the great Physician. When we are in pain or facing a problem, it’s hard to focus on anything else.
In a separate conversation she (like Julian) reminded me how I and others need more grace. You see when our focus is on our pain, we can’t be generous conduits of God’s grace.
On this Monday morning, if you too have pain or unanswered prayers and are tempted to feel depressed, don’t let your circumstances cause you to forget what God thinks of you. You are precious in His sight! And don’t let them keep you from enjoying Him and His creation.
How do we remain generous despite the brokenness and pain in this world? We ask for more grace while waiting for a better gift. Such a posture renews us inwardly and takes our gaze off the earthly and fixes it to the eternal.