Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should. Ephesians 6:19-20
“It means a lot to me that you keep in touch and that you are willing to support me with your prayers. If anything holds me up, it is the prayers of friends and I rely on them. What I am experiencing is a really deep spiritual crisis in which I realize that God wants all of my heart, not simply a part of it. It seems as if He wants to test my faithfulness and my commitment in a new way. He is really asking me to let go of everything that does not bring me closer to Him. He calls me to a more generous prayer life and to a more fearless ministry. This year is a kind of desert year to purify my heart. It is painful, but also full of grace.”
Henri Nouwen in Love, Henri: Letters on the Spiritual Life (New York: Convergent, 2016) in his letter dated 19 May 1988 to his friend Robert J. Wicks, a spiritual writer and professor of pastoral counseling at Loyola College in Maryland. Therein he shares his hope that he can return to Daybreak “before too long” and identifies his recent experience as a “deep spiritual crisis.”
I searched Henri’s use of the word “generous” in this collection of his letters and got a flood of occurrences. I plan to share them over the next few days. And since “share” is my word for the year, let me know if you want the PDF of this book, because I located a free copy for reading and sharing.
What struck me today was the parallel between Paul’s hard year in chains and Henri’s desert year to purify his heart. Henri felt God calling him “to a more generous prayer life and to a more fearless ministry.” It teaches me that God wants us to commune with him and that may push us out of our comfort zone.
He may take us to places like prison (in Paul’s case) where He knows some of our best work can happen. It’s counterintuitive. But that’s how the spiritual life works. We don’t lose, we gain when we give. And when we experience hard times, a more generous prayer life propels us to fearless ministry.
Think more deeply with me for a moment. Fear is what hinders us from generous service and holds us back. When we commune with God more generously, it launches us with new courage. When we pray for others, it impacts their lives too. Is God calling you to a more generous prayer life and fearless ministry?