Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” Mark 6:31
“God has called me to this holy retreat to give me an opportunity to reform my conduct by being enlightened in my relations and duties towards Him, and comparing these with my own conduct towards Him and comparing these in the past as unfolded to me through diligent self-examination. To accomplish this, I must look to myself alone, not to others; and I must propose to myself as my rule for making this retreat, the following motto: INGREDI TOTUS; MANERE SOLUS; EXIRE ALIUS—TO ENTER WHOLLY, TO REMAIN ALONE, AND TO COME OUT ANOTHER PERSON.”
John M. David in A Spiritual Retreat of Eight Days (Louisville: Webb and Levering; 1864) 84
It’s an unforgettable experience to do a 3-country, 16-day trip during COVID. I return home feeling both encouraged from seeing how God is at work and overwhelmed by the needs of those I served. I am grateful for the experience, yet absolutely exhausted.
For example, while same-day PCR tests don’t cost much in places like El Salvador or Bolivia, it felt like they extracted my sinus cavity rather than swabbing it. And having worn a mask nearly nonstop on the trip, I am happy to be home to remove it.
Speaking of masks, it was harder than I expected to teach to groups when you cannot see their facial expressions. The saving grace was meals with people. Even during COVID, people take the masks off for meals, and the fellowship was sweet. For most, these were their first meetings and meals out in over a year.
Now I plan to rest, largely speaking, at home and hope to come out another person. What will change? I am not sure really. I just know that I feel weary and reflective. Through self-examination, my hope is to come out transformed.
David suggests eight days. It’s that long until Easter. So, here’s the journey summarized (though I hope to emerge from quarantine with another COVID test before the celebration of the resurrection). Perhaps join me?
Day 1 – Reflect on my attachments. Day 2 – Confess sins. Day 3 – Think about death, judgment, and the prodigal son. Day 4 – Focus on Christ and following Him. Day 5 – Consider the life and teachings of Jesus, especially those related to money. Day 6 – Ponder passion week and Christ’s sacrifice. Day 7 – Contemplate the Crucifixion. Day 8 – Celebrate the Resurrection.
What does this have to do with generosity? Everything. Only when we identify our attachments, surrender them to God with humility, turn to Jesus, and sow His teachings afresh in our hearts, will Christian generosity be born anew in our lives after Easter.
God, make my journey to the cross and the empty tomb be a holy retreat of dilifent self-examination. Amen.