I am worn out from my groaning. All night long I flood my bed with weeping and drench my couch with tears. Psalm 6:6
“But let us all humble our own souls by almsgiving and forgiving our neighbors their trespasses, by not remembering injuries, nor avenging ourselves. If we continually reflect on our sins, no external circumstances can make us elated: neither riches, nor power, nor authority, nor honor; nay, even should we sit in the imperial chariot itself, we shall sigh bitterly: Since even the blessed David was a King, and yet he said, “Every night I will wash my bed,” (Psalm 6:6): and he was not at all hurt by the purple robe and the diadem: he was not puffed up; for he knew himself to be a man, and inasmuch as his heart had been made contrite, he went mourning.”
John Chrysostom in Epistle to the Hebrews, Homily 9.9.
I resonate with John Chrysostom and his counsel to walk the way of humility and generosity by excelling in almsgiving, forgiving, and reflection on my own sin.
When I chose rightly, the Lord often blesses me. Sometimes it takes the form of material blessings. Then, almsgiving frees me from the power over money in my life. Alas, I experience victory.
Then, in real time, it seems like so many people wrong me. It’s so hard but I need to choose to forgive them as God in Christ forgave me, even when I was undeserving. Not as easy a victory to win.
Then in celebrating these victories, I realize I have succumbed to pride. I am so broken. Now I see why King David agonized in solitude and gave thanks for God’s abundant compassion and mercy.
Sound familiar? I am learning that growth in generosity is rooted in grace (almsgiving), shows mercy to the undeserving (forgiveness), and is characterized by humility (reflection).
God help us be people who give, forgive, and humbly reflect like King David.