Meditations

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

“I worked with a particularly high-performing business unit whose leader was renowned for driving hope and sustained movement in his troops. He did it through a daily, fifteen-minute morning meeting to cast vision, give information, share stories of success, and infuse strategy, thus giving a daily dose of energy that kept it all moving. He used these short meetings to make sure everyone was aligned around the goal, to catch problems early, and to give his team a space in which to share lessons and acknowledge progress. This daily infusion of energy kept the team and the process moving. It’s worth noting that the meetings were short, and they didn’t require preparation, so they weren’t distractions from the real work of change; instead, they became moments to mark forward progress and even to celebrate those incremental steps in the right direction.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 93.

Today marks my last post from this book. If you want the PDF copy, reply to this email or download it here.

I chose this post as it provides a great transition to Lent which starts tomorrow. We build and maintain momentum in the primary disciplines of the Christian faith – in prayer, fasting, and giving – during Lent.

Since most people don’t realize Lent is 40 fasting days and 7 feast days, I will structure my next 47 posts featuring the significance of 40 and 7 in Scripture (to see why the early church picked those numbers) and build a Lent devotional one day at a time.

I will release it in published form for you to share with others next year entitled, Forty and Seven. I have not sorted the subtitle yet.

But today Cloud reminds us of the impact a small commitment over many days can have. You can imagine his high-performing business unit illustration. It reminds me of how I built GTP and how I pray they sustain momentum on my sabbatical.

But I picture this as Lent in each of our lives. We fast for 40 days, perhaps from choice foods like Daniel or from things that desire to control us like sweets, caffeine, alcohol, or other things.

Others will fast from technology, games, social media, or other practices that dominate their time. Regardless, I encourage you to choose a food as fasting in Scripture links to food.

We enjoy these items on the seven feast days leading up to Easter, the seventh of seven feast days. And hopefully we have been transformed in the process. We have built momentum to sustain life after Lent.

I pray this resonates with you. I pray you join me in observing Lent this year to fast to detach from the world, to pray to connect to God, and to give to play your role as a conduit of blessing to the world. That’s Lent. It starts tomorrow.

And for the record, today marks Fat Tuesday (or Shrove Tuesday) which is the day of indulgence before the fast. Enjoy, just don’t go overboard. Do it as a celebration to enter the journey of Lent.

The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. Proverbs 12:26

“Conversely, if someone desires change but is still hanging around people who work against that change, the risk is much greater. An addict must, for example, lose the phone numbers of his addict friends. A nonperformer must shun other nonperformers. In the same ways that we worry about whom our kids hang around with, we need to worry about it in the change process for adults as well. This is another good reason to prune the nonperformers out of a company, as other people “catch” the sickness. And it is a good reason for leaders to make sure that the people they are trying to develop spend a lot of time around high-performers.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 88.

Today’s post reads the opposite of yesterday. Yesterday we learned the healthy living is contagious. Today, we see that spending time with unhealthy people can cause us to catch the sickness.

So, like yesterday, I will ask you a question. Do you spend time with people who are not generous people? We might describe such people as materialistic, selfish, miserly, greedy, or worldly.

Stop for a moment and think about the people you spend time with. Do any of them demonstrate these traits. Again, make a list on a piece of paper or in your phone.

What would it look like to spend less time with those people this Lent. Again, Lent begins on 18 February 2026 (Ash Wednesday) to 5 April 2025 (Easter Sunday).

How would this shape your generosity? You become like the people you spend time with. Let’s go back to today’s Scripture. The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Remember, in biblical terms, “righteous” means choosing God’s right path and “wicked” refers to those who do not choose God’s right pay. The people who spend time with influence us, toward generosity or away from it.

I am not telling you to isolate yourself from humans who may need to grow in this grace. I am merely inviting you to intentional social interaction this Lent for your growth.

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. Proverbs 13:20

“Recent research has shown that a lot of what people desire in life, such as healthy lifestyles, is actually “contagious.” If they are surrounded by overweight people, for example, they have a much higher chance of being overweight. But if they are surrounded by people who are healthy, that is contagious as well. Their efforts are supported and not thwarted.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 87.

Do you spend time with generous people? Stop for a moment and think about the top 5 or 10 most generous people you know. Maybe make a list on a piece of paper or in your phone.

What would it look like to spend more time with those people this Lent. Lent begins on 18 February 2026 (Ash Wednesday) to 5 April 2025 (Easter Sunday).

If the people on your list live at a distance you can have a phone or video call with them. If they live close by you could arrange time together. How would this shape your generosity?

I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings. Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. Luke 16:9-10

“I was talking to a wealthy friend one time about the ways that he invests his money, wondering how he made his investment decisions. What industries and businesses did he prefer, and so on? What he said applies to our discussion here. He told me that he does not invest in businesses, other than his own. When he said that, I disagreed, as I knew of several that he had invested in, and I said so. “Not true,” he said. “I did not invest in those businesses at all. I don’t know anything about those industries.

What I invested in was what I always invest in: the person. In all of those investments, I knew the leader and his or her team, their track record, and their character. That is what I was investing in, not the business. I would not have understood it if they had tried over and over to explain it. Surely I looked at it and tried to understand as best I could, but the real investment was in the people who were running it and whom I trusted.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 80-81.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone.

As I finish reading this book before Lent and come upon this special day, this post seemed fitting. I want to start by thanking readers out there for the love they have show me, for the trust they have placed in me, and for the investments they have made in me. Thanks.

Now a comment to apply today’s Scripture and post to our lives.

Use whatever worldly wealthy you have to make friends for eternity. And invest in people with a track record that you can trust. Send them a message today that you love them and you believe in them. Send them a word of encouragement and a prayer of blessing.

Life is short. Invest in good people!

Today for Valentine’s Day I got Jenni some special gifts. And we are also doing a food tour in downtown Denver. We will taste Italian, Mexican, and more over three hours. Why do this? It’s an investment in our marriage. And Jenni is the best thing that ever happened to me next to Jesus.

Again, Happy Valentine’s Day everyone.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

“The first step that will motivate you to do what is necessary is to see that what you are doing has no hope of getting what you want. When that happens, you will instantly feel an epiphany. Y ou realize that to get where you want to get,
you must make a change. You really get it that to continue to do what you are doing is hopeless, and then you will begin to see motivation to make a change appear. So hopelessness can bring us closer to fearlessness, as it does not take courage to stop doing what you know is not going to work.

When you see a train coming, you have fear working for you, motivating you to get out of the way. It just takes a clear dose of the reality, over and over, to confirm that you are going nowhere. It creates its own discomfort, which motivates us to action. It is sometimes the most important step you can take, as it will fuel you to make a move. But remember, to get there, you have to get honest with yourself and be ready to see hopelessness as if it is staring you in the face.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 68.

What do hope and hopelessness have to do with generosity? Everything.

God wants us to abound in hope. We do that when we trust Him completely with everything. When we daily say “Jesus I surrender myself to you, take care of everything!” We abound with hope.

And yet, in the midst of our days, we will feel a sense of hopelessness. Why?

It’s a gift actually. It’s a voice from heaven saying what you are doing is not working. Stop it. Take another path. You are standing on the railroad tracks and the train is coming. Get off. Make a change.

This book is helping me see areas in my life that need pruning or where I need to make changes to be the person God wants me to be.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8-9

In several industries in which I worked during the economic crisis, particularly ones that were highly sales driven, I began to notice a syndrome very similar to what Martin Seligman termed learned helplessness. It is a condition in which the person adapts to the misery because they feel that there is nothing they can do about it. It is totally out of their control. Bad market or bad economy equals bad results. That is their mental map, and they act accordingly…

But I saw something else going on as well. In several of these situations, even when I saw stuckness and an adaptation to the misery as the new normal, I also observed some high performance occurring too, sometimes right down the hall. In other words, same market, same external conditions, yet a different set of behaviors and results. Why? The difference was in the brains, the mental models, of the ones who were performing versus the ones who weren’t.

First of all, those who were not stuck had a different map of the world. Some did not assume that “there are no buyers right now.” They thought instead that in the chaos, there were many, many potential customers who needed to be shepherded through the challenging environment and were being ignored. So they got even busier and contacted them. This was true in several industries that I observed, even the “deadest” ones, like real estate.

Second, their focus was different. They did not spend their time and energy focusing on all of the things that were falling apart that they could do nothing about. Instead, they thought hard and fast about what they could do. In a learned-helplessness model, the brain begins to interpret events in a negative way, thus reinforcing its belief that “all is bad.” For instance, when someone doesn’t get a sale, it means “I am a loser, the whole business is bad, and it isn’t going to change.”

These are called by Seligman and others the three P’s. Events are processed in predictable, negative ways: first, as personalized (I am a bad salesperson); second, as pervasive (everything I do, or every aspect of
the business, is bad); and third, as permanent (nothing is going to change). You can easily see why this leads to helplessness and inactivity.

But the productive people did not think in a learned-helplessness way. Their internal software was more optimistic, seeing a “non-sale” as just one more number to get past to get to the one that was going to buy and sustaining other such optimistic-thinking paradigms.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 49-50.

I am enjoying this book and will post from it for another week or so.

Then I am excited to “write” a new Lent devotional book in real time in my Daily Meditations this year for world release next year. I will share the title and theme next Tuesday as Lent starts on 18 February 2026.

Related to today’s post, I see this concept all the time in Christian workers who have partnership or fundraising responsibilities. I ask a few questions and see they are lost in a state of learned helplessness.

When fundraisers focus on results they cannot control rather than doing the faithful work of inviting people to participate in God’s work, they see no fruits the three P’s play out.

First, they personalize it thinking that they cannot raise funds like the other people. When in reality, God supplies the funds, not people. People do the work of communicating giving opportunities and doing diligent follow up.

Second, the learned helplessness becomes pervasive. It causes them to lose sight of their mission. They act as though God has abandoned them. Or they pin the blame on external factors when they have an internal issue.

Third, the toxic mindset metastasizes. It becomes permanent. The only way out of this is found in today’s Scripture. They have to focus on what is true and right and good and put it into practice. The fruit will come.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

“Have you ever had an infected tooth pulled?” I asked. “Sure.” “Did you have a nice ride home?” I asked. (Laughing) “No, it was awful.” “Well, that was negative, . . . or was it?” I asked. “If you define negative as
feeling crummy, I agree it was. But if you define negative as ‘harmful,’ I would not call it negative but positive. It was not harmful at all for the dentist to inflict that pain. In fact, it was a very positive event, right? A healing event?” I asked. “Yes, sure it was,” she said. “There is a big difference between hurt and harm,” I said. “We all hurt sometimes in facing hard truths, but it makes us grow. It can be the source of huge growth. That is not harmful. Harm is when you damage someone. Facing reality is usually not a damaging experience, even though it can hurt.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 24-25.

I am reading this book with my long-time friend Dr. Chi-Chung Keung. We discussed two chapters last night. He commented on appreciating learning the difference between hurt and harm. This post sums up the difference.

We talked about how God allows things in our lives that might hurt. But they do not intend to harm us but to help us, to prune us, to change our deployment of time and energy in one place so we can direct it elsewhere.

In this light, generosity appears as the gracious hand of the gardener doing some pruning in our lives and allowing us to experience hurt in ways that aim not to bring us harm but to do us good. Thanks God.

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. John 15:1

“One reason pruning is needed is the fact that the bush produces more buds than it can bring to full maturity. Any bush that is alive and thriving is producing more and more buds every cycle. And any person or business that is thriving is doing the same. Life begets life. That is normal. But it can be too much, as well.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 43.

Jesus is the true vine. The Father in heaven is the gardener. And we are branches that produce buds.

And today I learned a fact of life. Our branches produce more buds than we can bring to maturity so pruning things, or in plain terms, not trying to do everything, helps us do the things we chose to do, more fruitful.

Here’s where this becomes challenging. Let’s say, like me, you have lots of capacity.

This can lead me to try to do more than I should and I could “do” myself to death. When I prune things, I can actually produce an insane amount of fruit by “not trying to do everything” but to do fewer things better.

I need to think more about this. Perhaps you do too? So how do we discern what to prune?

The key is in today’s Scripture, namely, abiding in the true vine of Jesus, and letting the Father, our gardener, cut off those buds that would not go to maturity, so that our lives produce both quality and abundant fruit.

Yet He has not left himself without testimony: He has shown kindness by giving you rain from heaven and crops in their seasons; He provides you with plenty of food and fills your hearts with joy. Acts 14:17

“Each season also has its own set of activities. Spring is about sowing and beginnings. Where there is nothing but a waiting field, the farmer sows seeds in the expectation that they will take root and produce a harvest. The tasks of spring include:

– Cleaning out what is left over from the winter’s dying plants;
– Gathering seeds;
– Figuring out which fields you are going to work;
– Making sure you have the resources to take you through the year;
– Actual sowing and planting;
– Protecting seedlings from the elements and intruders; and
– Nurturing the vision of the harvest to guide the task.

In summer, things change again. It is time to tend to what has taken root. The tasks of summer include:

– Directing resources to ensure the crops are growing;
– Preventing disease and keeping insects and other pests away;
– Watering, fertilizing, and pruning;
– Supporting the plants until they can stand on their own; and
– Monitoring, managing, and protecting the crops for the future.

Fall is harvest time:
– Acting with urgency to get crops out of the field before they rot or are damaged by rain or the cold of winter;
– Gathering the harvest completely, not leaving anything in the field;
– Harvesting with efficiency and watching the costs; and
– Harvesting with care so you don’t destroy the field in the process.

In winter, everything dies, though preparations continue. The tasks of winter include:

– Getting the financials in order;
– Squaring accounts with lenders for last years’ crops and lining up next year’s money;
– Repairing equipment and getting it ready for next year;
– Preparing fields for the upcoming year; and
– Reviewing the successes and failures of the past year and tweaking things to do everything better next year.

The problem comes when we do not accept or we willfully ignore these seasons… Believe in life cycles and seasons. They are real. Therefore, when the days get shorter or it is time to change, you will not think that “something is wrong,” but you will accept the change as readily as a farmer accepts the turning of the calendar. Then you will be able to end the previous season’s appropriate activities and move to the next. Endings are easier to embrace and execute when you believe something normal is happening.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 39-41.

As I ponder on sabbatical, I realize I am transitioning to a different season of life.

I am asking myself what things I need to be doing to wrap up the past season and prepare for the next one so I liked this list of things for the farmer.

For example, I am entering the season of serving as a grandfather and as a mentor. I will continue serving as a writer and speaker but I cannot serve as President & CEO any longer.

I am learning areas of my life that need more or less attention.

As I welcome these decisions, normal changes in seasons of life, I become more fruitful quicker. And if I don’t of course it limits my productivity.

I don’t have this figured out but I pray my journey inspires you out there to prune and to welcome change in the seasons of life to maximize our kingdom impact.

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise. Ephesians 5:15

“When we talk about necessary endings, it’s one thing to understand the theory behind the three reasons for pruning—good but not best, sick but not getting well, and long since dead—but it’s another thing entirely to apply those concepts in real life. We can’t execute endings in theory only, so they have to be clear in reality. The question is, What defines reality?

When pruning a rosebush, the first step is to ask, “What does a rose look like?” In other words, you have to know the standard you are pruning toward. The gardener knows what a healthy bud, branch, or bloom looks like and prunes with that standard in mind. The same thing is true in business and life—we have to have a good definition of what we want the outcome to look like and prune toward that…

Pruning is not easy. It is hard and there will be people who don’t like it, no matter what you do. You have to decide where your lines are, the values with which you will execute them, and go forward… Not every activity nor every person is a rose or will ever be one. One might be a great chrysanthemum, but remember, you are growing a rose of a business or life. So you have to begin by defining what you are pruning toward and the criteria by which you will keep or clip…

You can’t prune toward anything if you don’t know what you want. You have to figure out what you are trying to be or build and then define what the pruning standards are going to be. That definition and those standards will bring you to the pruning moments… “If you don’t know where you are heading, you’ll get there” applies to pruning as well. Define what you are shooting for, and then prune against that standard. That is when vision, goals, and even teams begin to take the shape that you desire.”

Henry Cloud in Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward (San Francisco: HarperCollins, 2011) 26-30.

What standard are you pruning toward?

I was messaging with a friend yesterday and the topic of the values of the team in sports history with the highest winning percentage came up: the New Zealand All Blacks.

One of their values is this: “Go for the Gap: When you are top of your game, change your game.”

Think about it. Most tend to rest on their laurels when they are on top of their game. Those who prune change their game and bear more fruit. Is that you? Do you want it to be?

Today I want to challenge you to pray with me about what standard you prune toward.

We will not get where we want to go in our generous living, giving, serving, and loving if we do not know where we are heading and prune toward that goal.