Meditations

“A generous nature, when it forgives an abuse of its favors, seeks by increased kindness to prevent a repetition of the ingratitude.”

Christian Nestell Bovee (1820-1904) American author, in Day’s Collacon compiled and arranged by Edward Parsons Day (New York: IPPO, 1884) 316.

Ingratitude leads to the abuse of favors. Favors, of course, come from God, but they are often channeled through people. If people with a generous nature (who have gotten that way because God is at work in them) want to help others grow (from ingratitude to gratitude), the answer is “increased kindness” or in plain terms, “kill” the ingratitude with kindness.

“All my experiences of the world teach me that, in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, the safe and just side of a question is the generous and merciful side.”

Anna Murphy Jameson (1797-1860), art historian, essayist, in Day’s Collacon compiled and arranged by Edward Parsons Day (New York: IPPO, 1884) 316.

What great advice! Especially considering Jesus said that the measure we use to judge others will be the measure used with us (cf. Matthew 7:2).

As we prepare our hearts for the arrival of Jesus on this, the second Sunday of Advent. Let us give thanks for God’s generosity and mercy to us and show our gratitude by extending generosity and mercy to others.

“I like to claim that I always live abundantly and gratefully. I strive to give thanks often and to show appreciation and gratitude. I find that life is always richer when I take the time to say thank you to someone, to write a thank you note, or to acknowledge the good work someone has done. That said, it’s not always easy.

What happens in life can sometimes distract from living abundantly. Job and income situations can change…I would be lying though if I said there weren’t times when I was a bit nervous about if we could make ends meet, pay student loans, and still give financially to our faith communities and to those causes and organizations we love to support. These hard times can lead to a feeling that we don’t have enough: that our resources and means are scarce.

When this is the case, I have found it important to take a step back. Yes, looking over our budget and finances helps ease my mind, but more importantly, having a conversation with my wife about our finances usually helps. She reminds me, and I her, that we’re okay. In creating a practice that works for us, we review our finances and budget together over a homemade pancake breakfast on a Saturday morning at least once a month. We call those our “budget breakfasts”…

Timothy Siburg in Ecumenical Stewardship Center blogpost on 11 November 2014. This blog is a component of the Ecumenical Stewardship Center’s COMPASS initiative to engage young adults in conversations about faith and finances.

Some might jump at this idea just for the homemade pancakes. My wife is wonderful to discuss the budget whenever and wherever, but she would jump if I offered her a venti skinny cinnamon dolce latte. For those who are married, the point is to create a regular routine to talk about the budget. Singles can try this with a trusted friend.

Budgets are nothing more than financial plans for allocating faithfully the resources in our stewardship. We have learned to budget some flexibility both in the “living” lines and in the “giving” lines so that when spontaneous needs or giving opportunities pop up, we are ready to spend or share (cf. 1 Timothy 6:18). Is it time for “budget breakfast” with your spouse or a friend?

“Not having enough is certainly a problem. A lack of food, money or medicine can be life-threatening and is experienced by many around the world. Much is being done to solve the social issues of “not enough.” However, as I pushed myself away from the table on Thanksgiving Day, I was reminded of problems associated with having too much. More than enough food left me lethargic and uncomfortable. Do you know that feeling?

Much is being done to solve the social issues of “not enough.” But little is being done to encourage examining problems created by those who have “too much.” Coveting more without sharing causes a generosity gap that can create that same feeling left by eating too much – lethargy and discomfort.

It may seem counterintuitive but withholding giving to others brings suffering. On the other hand, blessing others brings true riches.

One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered. Proverbs 11:24-25 (ESV)

Enough is Enough! Let us find true joy and riches by our generosity…”

Bob Snyder, MD, in Lessons Learned on the Journey blogpost on 4 December 2014.

Bob’s not only an ER doctor that can diagnose a problem in a snap, he’s a trusted friend. In that moment when he realized he had “too much” his mind immediately turned to what needed to be done. The prescription for prosperity (what we must do when we flourish) is to pause, say “enough is enough” and see to the flourishing of others: our neighbors, fellow believers, our community, and those who suffer.

This Advent we keep bumping into the counterintuitive nature of generosity. If we give, we receive blessing. If we don’t, we are the ones who suffer want. When we share what we have, we don’t end up impoverished, but richer for our generosity. Solomon figured this out, as did my doctor friend. Let’s practice it this Advent so that it becomes a way of life for each of us. Enough is enough (cf. 1 Timothy 6:8).

“To be generous is to offer what we have, whether in moderation or in abundance, to those in need. Being generous does not always depend on finances. We show generosity by using our various giftedness: generosity with on-going forgiveness; generosity with our love, attention and compassion; generosity with moments of attentive listening; and generosity with whatever it takes to help another discover not only the love of God, but personal encouragement in the transformational experience toward Christlikeness.”

Diana Bennett, Director of Emmaus, Leadership Transformations, Inc., in “The Discipline of Generosity” the 24th edition of Silenco, December 2014.

During Advent we celebrate the first coming of Jesus. In His earthly ministry, He was generous to forgive, show compassion, listen, and love. To train ourselves to live this way throughout the year, this Advent season let’s practice the discipline of generosity in all we do, so that we look like Christ wherever we go…generously forgiving, showing compassion, listening, and loving.

“Now I care far more for how humanity lives than how long. Progress, for me, means increasing goodness and happiness of individual lives. For the species, as for each man, mere longevity seems to me a contemptible ideal.”

C.S. Lewis (1898-1963) in “Is Progress Possible?” essay in God in the Dock (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1970) 347.

What do you care most about? Many people today pour lots time, energy, and money into living longer. Some argue they do this because they are afraid to die. Lewis suggests rather than focusing on living longer, we should consider how we are living. Why? In the words of William Wallace (Braveheart, 1995): “Every man dies, not every man really lives.”

Let us resolve today to really live. Let’s choose to use all the strength, giftedness, and resources we have for God to increase the goodness and happiness of others. Don’t do this just because Lewis or I say so. Let’s do it because it’s what Jesus did (cf. Peter’s description of Jesus in Acts 10:38)!

“Nothing is more valuable and commendable, and yet not one duty is less practiced, than that of charity. We often pretend concern and pity for the misery and distress of our fellow creatures, but yet seldom commiserate their condition so much as to relieve them according to our abilities; but unless we assist them with what they may stand in need of, for the body, as well as for the soul, all our wishes are no more than words of no value or regard, and are not to be esteemed or regarded; for when we hear of any deplorable circumstance, in which our fellow creatures are involved, be they friends or enemies, it is our duty, as Christians, to assist them to the utmost of our power…

For if we have not charity, we are not Christians: charity is the great duty of Christians; and where is our Christianity, if we want charity? Therefore let me beseech you to exercise charity to your distressed fellow creatures. Indeed my dear brethren, this is truly commendable, truly valuable; and therefore, I beseech you, in the bowels of tender mercy to Christ, to consider his poor distressed members; exercise, exercise, I beseech you, this charity. If you have no compassion, you anre not true disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ. I humble beg you to consider those who want relief and are really destitute, and relieve them according to your abilities.”

George Whitefield (1714-1770) in “The Great Duty of Charity Recommended” sermon on 1 Corinthians 13:8 Sermons of George Whitefield (Peabody: Hendrickson, 2009) 241, 249.

The core of Christianity is charity. Why must we exercise it? To commiserate with the spiritually broken, relieve the physically afflicted, and assist the emotionally distressed according to our ability is a reflection of what Christ did for us that first Christmas in becoming man. He did not send help, He came and at every turn He graciously aided the destitute.

Why don’t we exercise it? Why, in the words of Whitefield, is it “less practiced”? There are a host of reasons. Our sin nature leans toward selfishness. We wrongly seek security our abundance rather than the God who provided it, much like the Israelites of old worshipped the golden calf rather than the God who gave them the calf. We judge whether others are worthy of our aid. The list goes on.

So for all who claim to be Christians, let us exercise our minds for spiritual health and our bodies for physical health, and this advent season, may we train ourselves to exercise our hearts, hands, and feet to race to charity. Why not start today, it’s Giving Tuesday! Charity is not optional. As Whitfield says if you are disinterested in charity, please abandon the label Christian immediately.

“Do you give all you can? You who receive five hundred pounds a year, and spend only two hundred. Do you give three hundred back to God? If not, you certainly rob God of that three hundred. You that receive two hundred, and spend but one, do you give God the other hundred? If not, you rob him of just so much. “Nay, may I not do what I will with my own?”

Here lies the ground of your mistake. It is not your own. It cannot be, unless you are Lord of heaven and earth. “However, I must provide for my children.” Certainly. But how? By making them rich? Then you will probably make them heathens, as some of you have done already. “What shall I do, then?” Lord, speak to their hearts! Else the Preacher speaks in vain.

Leave them enough to live on, not in idleness and luxury, but by honest industry. And if you have not children, upon what Scriptural or rational principle can you leave a groat behind you more than will bury you. I pray consider, what are you the better for what you leave behind you? What does it signify, whether you leave behind you ten thousand pounds, or ten thousand shoes and boots? O leave nothing behind you! Send all you have before you into a better world!

Lend it, lend it all unto the Lord, and it shall be paid you again! Is there any danger that His truth should fail? It is fixed as the pillars of heaven. Haste, haste, my brethren, haste! Lest you be called away before you settled what you have on this security! When this is done, you may boldly say, “Now I have nothing to do but to die! Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit! Come, Lord Jesus! Come quickly!”

John Wesley (1703-1791) preached Sermon 126 “On The Danger Of Increasing Riches” in Bristol, England on 21 September 1790 only about six months before his own death. This excerpt comes from 126.2.17 and marks the conclusion of his message.

As Advent has begun, the words “Haste, haste!” ring in my ears from the famous carol, “What Child is this?” Why echo them today? Wesley calls people to hasten to be ready to meet Jesus. That’s what the Advent season is all about. Are you ready to meet Jesus and give an account for your stewardship? It’s not how you start, it’s how you finish that matters!

“Generous people, we show, tend to be happier and more fulfilled than their ungenerous counterparts. This is true in spite of the fact that many generous people we interviewed face similar life problems and setbacks, often similar to those experienced by the less generous. Practicing generosity does not guarantee a life free of troubles or crises…Generosity does not protect people from misfortune. Instead of keeping all of their resources to protect their own families and lifestyles, generous people give away some for the well-being of others. Rather than using all they have to build a bigger nest or finance a more secure lifestyle, they help to build others up and protect those who are more vulnerable…

They are noticeably happier–even though they do not have the perfect families, dream homes, or jobs, let alone the full bank accounts that their less generous counterparts point to as the alleged key to happiness…But the generous possess an insight usually missing among the less generous. They know that they already have enough, and that clinging to what they have or clamoring for more will not bring about greater happiness. So they share some of their time, money, and care with others. They tend to see the beauty of life, the value of solidarity, and their connection to humanity. Their perspective tells them that the world, properly viewed, is a place of abundance.”

Christian Smith and Hilary Davidson in The Paradox of Generosity: Giving We Receive, Grasping We Lose (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2014) 222-223.

This recent research by Smith and Davidson affirms the paradox of generosity in a world of abundance. The more we give, the more we receive. The more we bless, the more we are blessed. The data demonstrates that things like happiness, health, satisfaction are not found the abundance of possessions but in celebrating God’s abundance through enjoyment and sharing.

Ironically this research also reveals that for “generosity to enhance one’s well-being, it must be practiced. Single, random, irregular acts of generosity may be good to perform and may be beneficial for everyone involved. But to have the kind of clear, significant effects on well-being…generosity needs to become a practice, a routine, a regular part of life” (96).

So why share this as a meditation today? During holiday seasons we often have margin to talk with family members over meals, games, or other activities. In those settings we can talk about how we are bombarded by messages linked to scarcity and consumerism, which call us to hoard and overspend on needless things. When we share examples with each other, some of them sound good on the surface, while others are laughable.

These conversations are sacred moments when we can reflect on what is true. “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). Some, like Thomas want proof that this is true. Smith and Davidson offer just that. “One of the goals in our conducting this research…has been to foster precisely these kinds of conversations and to explore the potential life changes they might produce” (227).

Resolve to talk about this with someone this Christmas season. Say: “I am learning that when I choose abundance over scarcity, contentment over consumerism, and sharing over hoarding, I get a glimpse of life as God intends it. When I live this way over time, I feel I take hold of the life that is really life” (1 Timothy 6:17-19). Then ask them what they are learning. In turn, listen and love generously.

“The results of this study suggest…females were more generous than were males, males were more materialistic than were females, and the genders did not differ in frugality. Concerning age, the results were interesting, and somewhat unsettling. Despite the fact that cognitive maturation should allow for greater financial restraint and concern for others, older children were less frugal and less generous than were younger children.

These results may indicate that children are being successfully socialized into the consumer beliefs that one should buy what one wants when one wants it, and that they should keep their possessions to themselves, rather than share them. While this might be good news from the perspective of marketers and those who hope to indoctrinate the next generation into a consumer mentality that will support the growth of the U.S. economy, other results suggest numerous problems associated with such “successful” economic socialization.”

Tim Kasser in “Frugality, Generosity, and Materialism in Children and Adolescents” study among 10-18 year olds (John Knox College) 13-14.

This research reveals why we must teach biblical stewardship principles to our youth: our culture is indoctrinating them with a consumer mentality and the research reveals it’s working. James advises us not to be polluted by the world (James 1:27) and Paul says that we must not be conformed to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:1-2). Truth not only cleanses us, it transforms our lives and our youth! The next generation is counting on us to teach them the way from the Word. If we don’t, research says they will follow what the world says.